“V” Without Violence: Happy Bday Capt’n Max! Happy Anniversary Bonobo Way!
Length 1:56:24 Date: November 5, 2016
“Remember, remember the 5th of November,” quotes the classic “V for Vendetta,” one of several symbolic erotic themes for this effervescent gathering of artists, nudists, exhibitionists, rappers, comics, actors and sex rƎVO˩utionaries in the Womb Room of Bonoboville, LAX on November the 5th, 2016. From fiery speeches to anal art, boobie cake, naked masked dances, political comedy, Bonobo Way birthday-spankings and sexual confessions to Scorpio Communion, with this amazing show, to quote “V” again, “Together we give them a 5th of November that shall never, ever be forgot.”
Max’s Bday, Bonobo Way Holiday, Million Mask March
At the center of this unforgettable fiesta is Capt’n Max’s birthday. My beloved prime-mate and husband of 24 years, Capt’n Max, a.k.a., Pr. Maximillian R. Lobkowicz, is a life-long sex revolutionary, a real rƎVO˩utionary, my romantic hero, a pioneer in First Amendment freedoms, erotic expression and reader-written publishing, not to mention a fantastic foot rubber. Capt’n Max is my “V” without the violence.
It’s also the second anniversary of The Bonobo Way (now with 38 5-star reviews on Amazon), which is more evolution than revolution, as well as conflict resolution via peace through pleasure and female empowerment. And it’s the last Saturday before one of the craziest most polarizing Election Days in the history of the USA.
Plus it’s the 5th of November, Guy Fawkes Day, bonfire night, holiday of the disenfranchised, the “Anonymous” warriors in the Million Mask March. “Voilà! In view, a humble vaudevillian veteran cast vicariously as both victim and villain by the vicissitudes of Fate,” I intone, sporting my iconic Anonymous Mask under a black sombrero, my hairdresser Mark Brown’s black nylon cape worn backwards, red rose in one hand, though instead of a cutlass in the other, I’m wielding a silly sword dildo, my kind of weapon.
Truth be told, I’m not crazy about “V is for Vendetta” which may as well have been called “V for Violence.” The so-called good guy is even more violent than the bad guys! The anarchists are as bad as the monarchists. It’s more like the ongoing struggles of baboons than bonobos. But violence is the American Way of Movie-Making, and I’m all for the “idea” of the power-to-the-people movement… as long as “the people” aren’t Trump supporters. Furthermore, I love the symbol of the mask as a freeing agent that reveals as it conceals. In the Million Mask March, Bonoboville marches against war, occupation, police brutality, environmental destruction and sexual oppression—currently looming over our beds in the form of Prop 60 and a Trump-Pence America.
Taking Off the Mask—and Some Clothes—and Vote No On Prop 60!
“Beneath this mask is more than just flesh,” says V. “Beneath this mask is an idea, and ideas are bulletproof.” Unfortunately, beneath my mask is flesh that’s getting kind of itchy and pinched from wearing the damn mask so long. So I take it off, but the “idea” of a Bonobo Way RƎVO˩ution still lingers, and the fun and games are just beginning.
There are so many fantastic guests on this show, it should get its own TV series. We commence with our favorite pansensual power couple, Daniele Watts (it’s her bday too) and Chef Be*LIVE, both raised in strict 7th Day Adventist homes, and now they are married and swinging like bonobos through life. They are also the stars of our new video, produced by Mel Magazine, 3 Ways to Live like a Bonobo, which has received over 22,000 views on Facebook! Unfortunately, the article accompanying the video sucks, but you can’t have everything, and the video is adorable.
The Chef, in Daniele’s dress, and Daniele, in the Chef’s shirt, talk about testing the limits of their own pansensuality before stripping down to their birthday suits and dancing like the sex-rƎVO˩utionary “rawkstars” that they are, with and without the masks. For her birthday, Daniele gets a Juxleather finger flogger, a sexy rosary, a bare-bottomed Bonobo Way book–spanking and several erotic exotic adventures down the rabbit hole of Bonoboville.
Gender-fluid Jay Toriko, clad in shiny black PVC, is in attendance, as is sultry Rhiannon Aarons, artist, MILF and co-author of The Book of Medicine, last seen on Kink Month 2 with Sheree Rose. For this special pre-Election Day show, Rhiannon sports sexy “No Prop 60” buttons on her nipples.
The buttons come thanks to another return guest, the sweet and passionate Siouxsie Q James of the Free Speech Coalition, who encourages us, one last time before election day, to Vote No on Prop 60. Just in case you’re a Californian with your head in our golden sand, Prop 60 is Michael Weinstein’s Frankenstein (with apologies to Mary Shelly) proposition that would bring such sexual oppression to the Golden State, we’ll need some kind of “V” of the legal system to make things okay again. Watch our No Prop 60 show with Siouxsie and Julia Ann for more about why your “NO’ vote on prop 60 is so important to the future of our most basic sexual freedoms. Even you don’t give a damn about the political debacle that is The Pussy-Grabber Don and Military Hillary show, at least give a fuck about fucking, V for Vote #NoProp60.
Anal Art & Bonobo Way Female Empowerment
Capt’n Max’s birthday is blessed indeed by a visit from “Unlicensed Professionals,” Catherine Imperio and Samantha Fairley, who look stunning as ever; Sam in a teeny plaid schoolgirl skirt and Cate in teensy-weensy bikini bra and jeweled g-string with pink hair and a big pink feather boa robe that Mae West would love.
Cate also creates another great anal art piece, as she has done twice before, at the Bonobo Spring Bacchanal and on our 23rd Wedding Anniversary. This time, she outdoes herself, using black and green Sharpies to create an anal art portrait of the Birthday Boy. The Chef gets one of the used Sharpies as a souvenir and Jacquie Blu gets the other one.
And yes, “anal art” means that the artist sticks the non-business end of the Sharpie into her (very clean) anus, clenches it with her formidable sphincter muscles, then draws stuff on a sheet of paper on a clipboard held in place by her trusty partner Sam.
Or as Max says when someone asks him who did the anal art piece hanging in the Bonoboville Erotic Art Gallery, “Oh, that was drawn by a real asshole.”
Both Cate and Sam, who have been driving down from Santa Barbara to join us for shows since 2011, bringing great bands like The DTease, as well as so much beauty, comedy and inspiration, receive Bonobo Way Female Empowerment Outreach Project awards of $100 each, made possible thanks to a generous gift from philanthropist, environmentalist, investor, inventor, bonobo buff and Bonobo Way reader Malcolm Jones. Woohoo! And Awomen.
Samantha is also a birthday girl, and she is optimally attired in that schoolgirl skirt that flips right up for an old-fashioned over the knee (OTK) book–spanking. And what a beautiful butt this birthday girl has!
It being such a big birthday, we have to have a birthday cake. It being Bonoboville, the serving “tray” of that birthday cake, is a naked lady. Well, almost naked. The lady is actually topless, but oh what a top.
Just beneath Rhiannon’s beautiful, bounteous, all-natural 36Gs, and just above the panty-line, her hubby Jonny Menton places his decadently delicious, homemade Foraged Food birthday cake which is festooned with whipped cream, candied raspberries and dozens of long white candles—like our Sexy Seder with a human menorah.
Suddenly, as we proceed to light all these candles on Rhiannon’s mostly Zen-still, but slightly shifting tummy (she has to breathe, after all), I panic with a vision of terror that we might have a real Guy Fawkes bonfire combined with an accidental human sacrifice right on my broadcast bed.
But Capt’n Max the Birthday Boy, my hero, saves the day, blowing out all the candles safely–except for a little hot wax which Rhiannon seems to enjoy—as he makes a wish and gives a speech as rousing as any given by V for peaceful rƎVO˩ution in our times.
Jonny puts dollops of whipped cream with raspberries on his wife’s nipples and chunks of Foraged Food cake on her breasts and belly. Like faux cannibals, we eat our cake off of her body, masked and unmasked. What a wonderful weird ritualistic feast! The Birthday Boy, both Birthday Girls, the Chef, a very hungry Jacquie Blu and I all take a bite or a slurp or both. What a great dessert after Sushi Girl. It feels like a sacred Scorpio food ritual of the late fall. We should have invited John Podesta!
Because you can never be too sweet in this sour, crab-apple world, and you can never have too much cake on your birthday, we bring in another cake baked in the Bonoboville commissary by Beverly Bonobo, in the shape of two perfectly round breasts. Not sure what else to do with it, my lovely assistant Gypsy Bonobo puts the cake boobs on Rhiannon’s real boobs for a double-stacked delight.
As an extra treat, Beverly bakes cute little penis cakes, that are especially scrumptious when mixed with a tangy “Cutie” citrus glaze. Yum! It’s the Bonoboville Erotic Foodie Show. Well, bonobos do love mixing food and sex. It’s the 5th step to Releasing Your Inner Bonobo.
Trump the Dick & Hillary on a Stick
Beverly’s little cock cakes are not as tiny as Trump’s micro-penis which we represent with a penis straw, of which our favorite U.S. Presidential candidate Mistress Tara would approve. Trump himself is represented on this show as a giant dickhead. That is, we put the Trump mask on top of our big pink penis pillow. This is the pillow that the LAPD used as evidence of some sort of sex crime (they weren’t sure what) when they raided the show in 2000.
Daniele falls a little bit in love with big pink fluffy Trump Dick, humping him lasciviously as I spank her naughty birthday-girl butt with The Bonobo Way. Someone says we’re being too nice to him. However we do have him bound and gagged, which is really the only way we can tolerate Trump. Daniele even gags him with the microphone!
So, Trump’s a Dick and we’ve got Hillary-on-a-Stick. Hillary is a stick in the mud, personality-wise, a hardened politician and a warmonger who will most likely continue and increase America’s perma wars. But Hillary the Stick is just not as awful as Trump Dick. The Supreme Court alone is enough reason to vote Hillary this Tuesday. That and she’s a woman. As Malcolm Jones says, “Give women a chance to run things.” Let’s show the world that, when given the choice, America believes in female empowerment.
Feeling empowered, Daniele humps our other Trump surrogate who obviously can’t handle the desires of a real woman, so she spanks him with the Bonobo Way, and off he goes to start Trump TV and other ego-stroking monstrosities.
Birthday Girl Communion
There’s so much going on that we only have time for one Bonoboville Communion, and that pleasurable honor, which is also an honorable pleasure, goes to the two Birthday Gals.
Samantha chooses to be Altar Girl, baring her sacred rack, cake smeared on one boob and salt sprinkled on the other, for former Seventh Day Adventist, actress and pansensual birthday girl Daniele to take her first communion. Then one birthday girl leans back against the other’s altar to receive her Waterboarding, bonobo-style with Agwa di Bolivia Herbal Coca Leaf Liqueur, taking it all down to the very last drop. And the Womb Room fairly explodes in synchronistic delight at their communion under the Scorpio moon.
Luzer & Netflix, The Kinkster & We Are One
Into this carnival of sex, cake, political theater and communion, wanders our favorite winning Luzer, as in “Best Actor” Winner Luzer Twersky (also seen in Transparent) in his “Call My Agent” T-shirt, to wish Max a happy birthday, sip his mojito, flick ashes pseudo-sadistically into Gypsy’s willing palm and join in the balmy merriment of Bonoboville one last time before he leaves for frigid New York to star in a Yiddish theater production.
Luzer is being trailed by award-winning filmmaker Rachel Grady and a Loki Films crew making a Netflix Original documentary about his emigration from the highly insular Satmar Hasidic Jewish community to Hollywood via Bonoboville.
Then Ikkor the Wolf steps up on the stage to sing “We Are One” as everyone dances, book-spanks and flashes a finger in the air. Speaking of “bulletproof” ideas, this is a good one, especially to remember, remember on the 9th of November, when the election results are in.
Other great music on this show includes The Kinkster by Mark Will of the band [ai] aka Carmina Formosa. Inspired by the book, in part, The Kinkster is our Bonobo Way second anniversary theme song. We also play Tchaikovsky’s 1812 Overture to connect with “V for Vendetta” fans and give these bacchanalian proceedings a sense of glory and climactic grandeur.
Me & My Birthday Boy
Having gone a half hour into overtime, we burst like a bonfire on the 5th of November into the afterparty, playing, dancing and yapping with the luxury of knowing it’s Daylight Savings Time so we get an “extra” hour, while dancing on the edge of the seemingly momentous voting riot expected to occur on November 8th, which happens to be Capt’n Max’s actual birthday. Who knows what Tuesday may bring, so today… let’s have sex!
After the afterparty, I blow out my Birthday Boy’s candle and give him some special private presents that (maybe) only a wife of 24+ years can give. How do we keep it up, so to speak? For one thing, all that bonoboësque fun with beautiful artists, actors, models and cake servers sure provides great foreplay to our otherwise pretty vanilla, but very orgasmic marital sex. Some have called us “vampiric” for that. We call it the Bonobo Way of long-term love.
Cheers to another great year of peace-through-pleasure rƎVO˩ution… no matter who wins!
Mark Brown; Camera Operator – Jamal Berry; Photographers – B. Natural Photography, Heberto Ferrer, Jux Lii (thanks for the Cannabelly!) L’Erotique, Sarah Bella; Bartender – Handsome Hollywood Jake; and our on-campus staff: Abe Bonobo, Beverly Bonobo, Del Rey, Gypsy Bonobo, Harry Sapien, Jacquie Blu, Mar Sorrell, and Zane Bono.
© November 6 2016. Susan Block, Ph.D., a.k.a. “Dr. Suzy,” is a world renowned LA sex therapist, author of The Bonobo Way: The Evolution of Peace through Pleasure and horny housewife, occasionally seen on HBO and other channels. For speaking engagements, call 310-568-0066.