Length 01:33:32 Date: Feb. 29th, 2020

by Dr. Susan Block.

Broadcasting live on February 29, we honor this ancient, traditional day for ladies to assert their sexual power over the gentlemen of their choosing.

“Leap Night” on DrSuzy.Tv with Sunshine McWane, Golden Flower Street and Catnip Biscuit. Photo: Yoel DeJesus

Since the beginning of human civilization, female sexual power has been the subject of great male desire, coupled with abject fear.

Maybe that’s why Leap Day or Leap Year Day occurs only once every four years.

Why Leap Day?

Scientifically speaking, Leap Day is an extra, “special” day (and night) added to the Gregorian calendar in “leap years” because the Earth does not orbit the sun in precisely 365 days, but rather closer to 365.25.

Pre-Show Group Selfie

Therefore, we have to get that 366th day in there once every four years, or after a few years.

Otherwise, the Equinox would fall on the Solstice, nobody would know when to celebrate anybody’s birthday, and everybody would be confused.

Ready to leap into Leap Night. Photo: Abe Bonobo

Leap Day keeps our calendar “regular,” but perhaps due to its own irregularity, Leap Day is a day when, traditionally, women propose marriage to men.

When humans were hunter-gatherers, there probably was no such thing as marriage, and women may have been just as likely to initiate romance as men.

As we *settled down* into farming, it became traditional for the man to ask the woman for her “hand” in marriage (unless a marriage was arranged by parents).

This has long been part of the general societal thrust toward women accepting the most passive gender, with men taking the more active, dynamic role.

Lights out for the glow. Photo: Flawless Viktory

And yet…

Women have needs and desires, and for various reasons, from shyness to lack of cash, men don’t always step up to the plate to satisfy them.

Thus Leap Day leapt in to fulfill the unfulfilled woman’s romantic, marital and sexual desires.

Women asserting desire. Photo: Abe Bonobo

Sadie Hawkins Day

You might have heard Leap Day called “Sadie Hawkins Day” (a hat tip to our dearly departed Dominatrix friend, the late great Goddess Sadie Hawkins), from the Lil Abner comic.

At Dogpatch’s Sadie Hawkins Day race, the sexy but lonely Daisy May catches the reluctant Lil Abner (was he supposed to be gay or just fearful of females?) and makes him marry her.

The gender-conscious role reversal was pretty shocking in the 1937 when the first Sadie Hawkins Day race was held, contributing to the ironic humor of Al Capp’s famously sexy strip.

Bachelor’s Day or St. Bridget’s Complaint

But the Leap Day tradition of ladies proposing to gentlemen dates back all the way to the 5^th century in Medieval Ireland, when they dubbed it Bachelor’s Day, or St. Bridget’s Complaint.

Irish Leap Year. Photo: Yoel DeJesus

Apparently, St. Bridget complained to St. Patrick that women had to wait too long for men to propose. So Paddy’s solution was to give the ladies this one day every four years to do the proposing themselves.

It’s not exactly the Equal Rights Amendment, but there are benefits.

If he says yes, the woman gets her man. If he says no, he then has to give the woman money or buy her a dress, gown, fur or 12 pairs of gloves (to cover up not having an engagement ring).

Sunshine & I announce our Leap Night proposals, past and present. Photo: Yoel DeJesus

Already counting her winnings (or losings), Sunshine is very excited to celebrate this Medieval Irish tradition.

Checking her notes, she reels off a list of every guy in Bonoboville, as well as a few more, including SNL comedian Pete Davidson as well as her beloved Peewee Herman, asking them all to marry her, knowing they won’t, but happy to *settle* for the money.

Sunshine proposes marriage to several lucky guys: Now say yes or pay up! Photo: Yoel DeJesus

I have yet to hear if she’s collected from any of these objects of her affection.

My Leap Year Marriage Proposal

Come to think of it, in a way, I proposed to Capt’n Max.

Telling the Tale of My Leap Year Marriage Proposal. Photo: Yoel DeJesus

Though it wasn’t exactly on a Leap Day, it was in a Leap Year, 1992 (some traditions give the women the entire Leap Year to make their affections known).

Actually, it was my mother who proposed.

Max and I had been living together for about six months when we flew out to Philly for a family function, and he met my Mom. Despite his distinct lack of cash or a standard *job,* his Italian charm made a good impression.

The Wedding Party, featuring Mom (first row, third from right).

Shortly after we returned to LA, Mom called me up and said, “So Suzy, when do you want to get married?”

“Married?” I asked, like I’d never heard of such a thing in my life.

“Just let me know,” she said. “Because I’ll need at least three months to reserve the synagogue.”

We bought the rings together. Photo: Selfie

That night I said to Max, “Mom wants to know when we’re getting married. She needs three months to reserve the synagogue.”

Which was as close to a marriage proposal as either one of us got.

Fortunately for everyone, Max accepted my proposal immediately and enthusiastically.

So he didn’t have to give me money or a dress or 12 pairs of gloves. Though we did get me a wedding gown, a tux for him and rings for both of us.

Mom took care of everything else. In a way, it was her wedding—from the rabbis (we had two) to the cake—she presided over everything but the sex.

It must have been a winning recipe because, more than 27 years later, we’re still at it.

Still leaping (though sometimes limping) for love, after 28 years. Photo: Selfie

So, for us, Leap Years are lucky.

My guests aren’t as excited as Sunshine and me about Leap Day or—since we broadcast the show from 10:30pm to Midnight—though, when pressed they do manage to propose to a few lucky guys.

It’s Leap Night, Ladies! To whom will YOU propose? Photo: Nemor

More about their choices in a minute!

Corona Beer Won’t Give You Coronavirus

First, we toast the holiday with a few Coronas.

Don’t blame the beer! Photo: Nemor

Yes, Coronas.

I’m not much of a beer drinker, but with this Coronavirus horror story growing to nightmarish proportions, we want to make something clear: Don’t blame the beer!

Photos 1-2: Flawless Viktory.  Photo 3: Yoel DeJesus

Seriously, there’s a report that 38% of Americans won’t buy Corona beer partly because they think it carries Coronavirus.

Ivanka finds a cure.

Not that I have any personal affection for Anheuser-Busch, but blaming the beer is just wrong.

Another Trumpus Rumpus “Hoax”

There’s so much misinformation, paranoia and denial swirling around COV-19, *like the plague.*

This is for calling coronavirus a “hoax.” Photo: Yoel DeJesus.

The Marmalade Maniac’s solution is to call it a “hoax” and put the prayerful Pence in charge, praying to Mommy (his wife) that he doesn’t get blamed for this shit.

This calls for whipping our Trumpus voodoo doll, still under gag order with Sunshine’s Lupercalian-red penis balloon.

Meanwhile, the actual Presidunce, more concerned about the falling stock market than dying Americans, has gutted and muzzled the CDC. and nobody knows what to do, except wash your hands, like 50 times a day.

Then there are the masks… to wear or not to wear? We’re told not to get the good ones because they’re needed by first responders, and the other ones are pretty useless in terms of protecting you from anything, except unwanted kisses.

Fashionable but fairly useless. Photo: Yoel DeJesus

But lots of people are wearing them anyway. Photos of Asian and Italian city streets, as well as airports everywhere, look like some sort of apocalyptic surgical mask fashion parade.

I guess you could say I predicted this when I gave GasMaskGirl the “Most Timely Fetish” 2019 SUZY award. I thought people would be wearing masks to ward off air pollution (which they are in some cities), but here we are masking ourselves to ward off a deadly new virus.

GasMaskGirls. Photo: Flawless Viktory

I really wish I wasn’t so prescient.

And how about those hazmat suits? They look like parachutes with arms and legs. Can hazmat suits be sexy? I guess that anything can be sexy, if you see it that way, especially when it comes to clothes.

One thing I’ve learned as a sex therapist, for every type of outfit, there’s a corresponding fetish.

Actually, anyone can be sexy in a hazmat suit, because it covers everything, so you can look like anything. In fact, I’m not sure those are all humans in those mysterious, billowing jumpsuits.

The big problem is that to prevent the transmission of the virus, we shouldn’t touch each other. And the big question is: how will we fare as humans… without touch?

Studies show how much people, like other mammals, need the warmth and comfort of each other’s touch, hugs, kisses, caresses, massages, even handshakes for the sake of our health and well-being, not to mention human relations.

No more French kissing! Just air-kissing from a safe distance of about six feet away.. Photo: Unscene Abe

How will refraining from touch in the Age of COV-19 affect us?

Well, at least we can have phone sex, webcam and sexting… they’re all sexy and safe!

Thank Goddess for the Erotic Theater of the Mind.

Catnip Biscuit

My two guests are both virgins to DrSuzy.Tv.

Catnip Biscuit on DrSuzy.Tv. Photo: Yoel DeJesus

First, we have Catnip Biscuit, an adorable, ginger-haired, 20-something artist, graphic designer and hula-hoopist from Wisconsin with a twinkle in her eye, a spring in her step and even a bit of a leap for Leap Night.

As befits her name, Catnip is wearing cat ears as well as pasties with a fishnet top, short shorts, sneakers and a strawberry belly pack.

Heeeeere Kitty Kitty Kitty…. Photo: Nemor

She looks cute as a kitty just sitting on the couch, making Leap Day marriage proposals to a couple of her heartthrobs, Lenny Kravitz and Aaron Paul.

If they know what’s good for them, they’ll both accept.

Catnip Hooping. Photo: Flawless Viktory

But Catnip really shines when she’s hooping…

Especially when we turn the lights out…

Catnip leaps through hoops into Leap Night! Photo: Yoel DeJesus

Her neon hoop glows brighter than the rings of Saturn.

She even does a bit of leaping for Leap Night, dancing in and out of the hoop like an feline angel spinning through the Milky Way.

Catnip hooping it up to the “Looney Tunes” of Looney Poptart. Photo: Yoel DeJesus

Not only is Catnip’s hooping more mesmerizing than a kitty with a ball of neon string, she does it to a couple of catchy tunes.

First, she hoops in the dark to “All About Her Money.”

Then the lights come on and she spins and whirls to “Watermelon Mango” (freestyle).

Watermelon Mango–delicious! Photo: Flawless Viktory

Both songs are composed by Catnip’s friend whose name is quirky as hers: Looney Poptart.

Golden Flower Street

It must be the night of funny names, because our other guest calls herself Golden Flower Street.

Golden Flower St. wants YOU. Photo: Yoel DeJesus

I guess that “Golden Flower” is code for “Golden Shower.”

Sure enough, Golden Flower Street (“Golden” for short) loves peeing, both giving and receiving.

A self-proclaimed “nymphomaniac” and webcam performer, Golden loves to perform all kinds of wild sex acts with a burlesque flair.

Sadly for Golden, water sports are not permitted on her webcam platform.

But she has other specialties.

Photo 1: Yoel DeJesus.  Photos 2-4: Nemor.  Photo 5: Flawless Viktory

Many of Golden’s fans are GILF lovers (see MILF and add a generation). At age 60, she’s certainly old enough to be a grandmother, though technically she’s nobody’s Grandma, being childfree.

But with her granny glasses, nude pantyhose, vintage fur and nympho attitude, it’s no wonder Golden’s got GILF fans galore.

Golden Swallow. Photo: Yoel DeJesus

Nevertheless, she identifies more as a cougar. She likes younger men, though she’ll take older ones as long as they can get hard and stay hard, as well as ejaculate (she’s a cum fetishist).

She does her part to “get it hard,” being an expert at deep-throating, which she demonstrates on one of my longest dildos, to the amazement of the Bonoboville congregation.

Golden gives Billdo a lik. Photo: Yoel DeJesus

A fan of Bill Clinton, she admires my Billdo and gives him a loving lick.

However, she declines to deep throat him due to the former President’s rather large head.

Foot Reveal. Photo: Flawless Viktory

Some of her fans are particularly into her feet, bare or in stockings.

Mentioning a foot fetish is the signal for us to kick off our heels and show off our tootsies.

Another angle on the tootsies. Photo: Yoel DeJesus

In between Catnip’s hula-hoop performances, Golden entertains us with a bawdy striptease.

Burlesque-style and cam-style, she teases and chats with her audience as she takes it off.

Golden reveals her breasts. Photo: Flawless Viktory

First, she reveals her breasts, which she describes as “perfect.”

Perfection is in the eyes and ears of the beholder (consider the Trumpus’ “perfect phone call” to Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelensky), but there’s no doubt Golden’s nipples are hard as golden nuggets.

Photos: Yoel DeJesus

Then she unveils her “snapping pussy.”

Yep, that’s what she calls it, bringing to mind the man-scaring myth of the “vagina dentata” (no wonder we can only ask them to marry us one day in four years), though I think she just means she’s got strong kegel muscles.

Just before Golden shows off her hairy bush, Sunshine reveals her unshaved armpits. Photo: Flawless Viktory

Snapping or flapping, Golden’s vulva sports a fine bush of hair, though it’s shaved around the labia.

When I ask Golden whom she’d like to propose marriage to on Leap Day, she hesitates, explaining that she’s head-over-heels for this guy she doesn’t want to marry.

Since he’s the jealous type and might be watching the show, she’s also reluctant to propose to other guys.

Though she does confess she’s got the hots for several football coaches, including LA Rams coach Sean McVay and Seattle Seahawks coach Pete Carroll.

Photos 1, 2, 4: Yoel DeJesus.  Photo 3: Flawless Viktory

Watch out for that snapping pussy, NFL!

Porn Stars Feel the Bern

While we’re making our Leap Night proposals, I ask Catnip if she’d like to propose to Bernie Sanders, having noticed a couple of retweets from him on her Twitter profile.

Let’s talk proposals… Photo: Yoel DeJesus

She blushes and confesses she has no interest in marrying Grandpa Bernie.

“It’s a platonic love,” she explains diplomatically.

Photos 1-2: Sunshine McWane.  Photo 3: Selfie

I take a moment to muse about Bernie, still the Democratic frontrunner, being gangbanged—nonconsensually, of course—by the DNC, the media, other candidates and anyone who’s afraid of that all-American expletive: socialism.

Actually, it’s more like gang-raped.

I’ve said it before, but I’ll say it again: I’m voting Blue No Matter Who… even if I have to pinch my stuffed up nose with a clothespin to do it.

I’ll vote for Joe, Liz, Mike, a Corona beer a fucking fire hydrant over the Trumposity.

I’d vote for this Corona beer over the Trumpus, whom we keep under gag order with a penis balloon. Photo: Unscene Abe

But in the primaries, I’m a Bernie Babe. Check out my ballot…

There are millions of us who not only want to get rid of the tRump virus, but work to eliminate the causes (especially economic inequity) that created a Presidunce tRump in the first place.

I’m sad to say we’ll probably never get there will all the neo-liberal powers and wannabe powers lining up against Bernie like a ferocious firing squad.

Shoot Sparks, Not Guns. Photo: Unscene Abe

Here’s a cool constituency for Uncle B: Porn Stars Feel the Bern. It makes sense, since Bernie is an original sponsor of the SAFE Sex Workers Study Act, and the fact that he supported sex work decriminalization before Liz Warren jumped on that bandwagon, though both voted in favor of FOSTA-SESTA in 2018. Almost every member of the Senate and most of the House voted for the stupid deadly SESTA-FOSTA bill, and then the mushroom-peepee John-in-Chief signed it into law.

Even worse, the Trumpus, despite allegedly conducting affairs with (and paying for the silence of) porn stars and making cameo appearances in a number of softcore videos, stands behind a Republican Party platform that branded porn as a “public health crisis.”

So according to His Orangeness, Coronovirus is a hoax, and porn is a “public health crisis.”

He may be a irreligious germaphobe, but he loves it when those preachers lay hands on him…

Germaphobe Trumpus accepts the Laying on of Hands for Evangelical Cash.

But back to Bernie. Porn star Sydney Leathers. (yes, the one who sexted with former New York Congressman and irresponsible exhibitionist Anthony Weiner) says, “I’m supporting Bernie because health care is my biggest issue as a voter and he’s the person with the best plan… I also believe he has the most motivated base, and the best chance of beating Trump.”

Porn stars need good health care, and so do the rest of us—especially now! Feel the Bern!

Ending America’s Perma-War on Afghanistan

BUT… credit where credit is due: At long last, the American occupation of Afghanistan is ending.

Whipping it up for the Bonobo Way and an end to all the Perma-Wars. Photo: Abe Bonobo

At least, tRump says it is.

Unless he just moves American troops from Kabul to Kandahar, which is something like what he did in Syria (currently exploding into all-out war with Turkey).

But if we can take the Trumpus at his word (which of course, we can’t, but who knows, maybe this time…), we are at long last, after 18 years of Perma-War, occupation, billions of dollars wasted and thousands of lives lost, while accomplishing basically nothing, with the Taliban stronger than ever, America is leaving Afghanistan, the “graveyard of empires.”

Photos 1 & 5: Yoel DeJesus.  Photo 2: Nemor.  Photo 3: Unscene Abe. Photo 4: Flawless Viktory

Well, whether you win, lose or it’s a wash; it’s very bonoboesque to end a war.

So, all in all, this is very good news.

Make love not war!

Good and Bad News

First, the bad news: Right-wing Trump-supporting billionaire Paul Singer of Elliot Management is buying Twitter! My favorite social media platform will soon bite the dust and eat the dirt of modern American fascism.

And some good news: I’ve been named DomCon 2020 Mistress of Ceremonies!

Check the press release for details.

And if you’d like to ogle some of the top Dommes of DomCon in action, pick up a copy of the SPANK ‘n’ Art edition of Dr. Susan Block’s SPEAKEASY JOURNAL.

Leap into Love

Winding up the show, we free the nips (though Catnip keeps her pasties on)!

Free the Nipple (and Pasties)! Photo: Unscene Abe

Then we spontaneously form a glittering grand finale.

Glowing in the dark, Catnip Biscuit spins her hoop as I whip Golden Flower Street’s naughty, nymphomaniacal butt (with a hat-tip to Laura from Germany on Facebook Live for the spanking suggestion).

Whipping Golden Ass. Photo: Abe Bonobo

Sunshine assumes center stage, perusing The Bonobo Way (see above), then studying Splosh ‘n’ Art.

I continue to whip as Catnip keeps on spinning.

Whipping, Spinning, Snapping & Reading. Photo: Yoel DeJesus

Yoel DeJesus, whom we know as a photographer, gives us a Leap Night surprise, tickling the keys of my great grandmother’s 1926 Steinway baby grand piano with professional finesse and passion.

Then we all eat, drink and make merry, for tomorrow we may all die, victims of a “hoax.”

Photo 1: Unscene Abe. Photos 2, 3, 5: Selfies.  Photo 4: Sunshine McWane.

In honor of Leap Day, I propose to Capt’n Max again, and he accepts… again, and we leap into each other’s arms (well, “crawl” might be a more accurate verb), explode into love and drift off into dreams.

It’s true I didn’t “look before I leapt” 28 years ago, but I’m so glad I took that fateful leap anyway.

Thanks for the push, Mom.

Keep safe, Brothers and Sisters, Lovers and Sinners. Keep healthy. Keep loving. Keep leaping!

Leaping Lovers. Photo: Selfie

© Feb. 29, 2020 Susan Block, Ph.D., a.k.a. “Dr. Suzy,” is a world renowned LA sex therapist, author of The Bonobo Way: The Evolution of Peace through Pleasure and horny housewife, occasionally seen on HBO and other channels. For speaking engagements, call 310-568-0066.