Labia Day 2016
Length 1:47:49 Date: September 3, 2016
Labor Day blossoms into “Labia Day,” like a lush Georgia O’Keeffe flower, in my Womb Room and throughout the verdant Garden of Bonoboville, as we once again strip this venerable old holiday of its corporate baggage, industrial origins and retail hypocrisy, opening up its hidden erogenous doors to the deepest pleasures, passion and the emergence of life.
We start with the cushiony satin labia of the Wondrous Vulva Puppet, but soon move on to the real deal: lovely vulvas of various types, styles, sizes and ages, shaved and hairy, featuring labia of all sizes, styles and ages, from teenage to MILF to GILF, including one proud mom who actually went into labor on Labor Day… and is accompanied by the FRUITS of her Labor—her son!
Yes indeed, this DrSuzy.Tv Labor Day weekend Saturday night special turns out to be quite the “family show”… but not in the usual sense of the term.
Honor Sex Work on Labor Day!
Labor Day purports to honor workers of all kinds, but what about sex workers? For instance, isn’t making pornography a type of labor? Yes indeed, and for our first guest, Baylie Kruz—serious medical professional by day and passionate 99Dollz porn starlet manager by night—it is certainly a “Labor of Love.”
Baylie returns to the Womb Room, courtesy of DrSuzy.Tv associate producer Sarah Bella Bonobo, with the effervescent and adorable Kenzie Jamez, who looks like she could be Baylie’s daughter (she isn’t). The two sizzling hot blondes dress up in very short plaid skirts and open white button-down tops, putting that Back-to-School spin on Labor Day festivities.
At the time of their first appearance on DrSuzy.Tv in Therapy for the Trumpocalypse, Kenzie was 18 years old, fresh out of Idaho and just starting out, under Baylie’s doting tutelage, on her grand quest for porn stardom. Now Kenzie is 19, still new-to-porn, though excelling at bachelor party entertainment, and she’s getting braver about showing off her beautiful curvy body, including the handprint on her naughty schoolgirl butt from last night’s spanking.
Kenzie also celebrates Labia Day, doffing her panties—and everything else!—to reveal her shaved-bald vulva and lovely labia, to the whistles and whoops of the Womb Room. Happy Labia Day, brothers and sisters, lovers and sinners!
Foxxy Ladies for Labia Day
Joining the Labor Day celebration and Labia Day revelation is sultry Carmen Foxx, also laboring in the fields of sex work, albeit of a different, more private nature. Carmen “came out” as a happy sex worker on last Saturday’s pan-tastic Pansensual Special, which featured her friends Chef Be*Live and Danièle Watts, where she played it down in sweats and sneaks.
This time, she is dolled up for 99Dollz, dressed to the nines in a tight little black number with heels and, conveniently, “forgetting” to wear panties. Thus she is the first in Bonoboville to reveal her luscious labia for Labia Day 2016, including her perfectly shaved mons pubis, sporting a lovely “Marilyn Monroe” beauty mark above the clitoris for all to ogle and admire. A wondrous vulva indeed! And one that commands a considerable rental price! This stimulates a fascinating discussion about what it really means to “pay for sex,” including how our kissing cousins, the bonobos do it.
PHOTOS 1 & 3: IRWIN. PHOTOS 2, 4 & 5: L’EROTIQUE
During the week between her appearances, Carmen has been reading The Bonobo Way: The Evolution of Peace through Pleasure. “I’ve cried and laughed and smiled so much reading your book,” she says. “It is incredible. I would like to buy a couple cases and start selling them to my clients and anyone who will buy them. We must spread the word (and spread our legs! Lol) and save the bonobos!”
The Singing Pornstar & the Kanye West Producer
Speaking of singing, this show, like so many recent DrSuzy.Tv episodes, overflows with music, featuring as much rock, rap and harmony as sex. Shakespeare said, “if music be the food of love, play on,” and indeed these two elemental pleasures do feed each other, especially in Bonoboville.
On Kenzie’s first appearance, she sang “Somewhere Over the Rainbow,” inspiring me to dub her “The Singing Porn Star.” This time, she performs a soaring a cappella rendition of Porgy and Bess’ “Summertime,” a bittersweet melody for Bonoboville as the sun sets on another beautiful Bonobo Summer of Love, and we begin our fall into an unknown Fall.
Kenzie isn’t our only musical guest this show. As a sort of last-minute surprise, thanks to the efforts of DrSuzy.Tv associate producers Jack Nice and Serenity Smith, we are delighted to receive David Hassan Khaffaf (aka Khaffallah), rapper and sometime music producer for perhaps the most famous rapper of our times, Kanye West.
In tune with our “family show” theme, we explore Hassan’s familial roots: His Iraqi grandfather was beheaded by Saddam Hussein during the period when the U.S. supported the notorious dictator. The child of a Muslim father and Christian mother (same as Handsome Hollywood Jake!), Hassan himself is a devout yet open-minded student of both the Koran and the Bible, religiously wearing his lucky leather pants and the oversized blue sweatshirt that Kanye gave him, a magic musical talisman that he also wears in the haunting video of Laylow (filmed at Kanye’s studio and Weller Court in LA’s Little Tokyo) that we play on the show.
Hassan’s moderate piety propels him over to the other side of the studio during most of the Labia Day displays. However, he says he loves it all and is “speechless” for the “first time.” Having been a fan of The Dr. Susan Block Show since he was a kid watching it on HBO and public access, he sweetly proclaims me to be an “icon.”
As Capt’n Max says, Hassan is one of our many “children” that grew up learning about sex, love and the Bonobo Way through our shows and HBO specials. So we are happy as proud parents to see Hassan’s professional and artistic success, and to hear him talk with good humor and affection about his intimate relationship with his girlfriend of several years. When asked about some of his other arrangements, he wisely “pleads the Fifth.”
Alas, not everyone who got sex-educated through The Dr. Susan Block Show shares the Captain’s and my progressive politics, so we are not too surprised (though somewhat miffed) to hear that the otherwise bright and talented Hassan supports Trump! At first, we think he’s just cracking another one of his deadpan jokes, but no, he really means it when he says we should put a businessman in the White House to improve America’s business. All we can say is that even if it was a good idea (which it isn’t), Trump’s business track record, aside from his wild success as America’s worst boss on The Apprentice, is abysmal, considering the piling-up lawsuits against Trump University for fraud and the dramatic failure of Trump Casinos in Atlantic City, stiffing many contractors and honest laborers, speaking of Labor Day.
South of the border, Mexican President Enrique Peña Nieto also appears to be a chump for Trump, having ceremoniously accepted the Mexico-insulting Donald as the statesman that he isn’t. But wait! What’s the hottest selling item in Mexico City? Trump piñatas! Obviously, the Mexican people *get* Trump, even if their President doesn’t. Meanwhile Hillary gave a serious foreign policy speech that nobody watched and, if they did, they fell asleep. Trump is a rude, narcissistic, con-man crybaby bully. Hillary’s worst crime? She’s borrring… which is why we currently support Mistress Tara Indiana for President (she showed us how she can BEAT Trump), unless it’s a close race, in which case, we will hold our noses and vote for the lesser of two evils who, at least, has a set of working labia, and that alone is (sort of) worth our vote in this historic, moronic election. Happy Labia Day!
We surely could have spent an entire show and afterparty debating presidential politics with Hassan, as he is so much smarter than the average Trump supporter, but we decided to “agree to disagree” and move onto more delectable topics… like Kenzie twerking and stripping to Kanye’s classic “Gold Digger” and Bonoboville Communion!
Going into Labor on Labor Day!
First Communion of the night features Idaho-fresh Kenzie as altar girl and Mormon-raised Baylie licking her nubile boobies with gusto, lime salt and a good waterboarding, bonobo-style via Agwa Coca Leaf Herbal Liqueur. Then Kenzie takes it from Baylie, though her under-21 status requires that she be waterboarded, bonobo-style with a Shirley Temple.
Unfortunately, there is not enough time to give Bonoboville Communion to all the thirsty seekers (so ya’ll gotta come back next Saturday!), but we do provide a very special First to Baylie’s adorable son, “Nathan Cruz” who is celebrating his 21st birthday.This might be the first time we’ve had a biological mother and son perform sex acts in the same show, which sounds a lot kinkier than it is, as they manage to coordinate things so that they are not in the same room when said sex acts occur. So sorry Kay Parker fans, but no, it’s nothing like Taboo.
When questioned several times regarding his feelings about his mother being in the pornography business, Nathan gives the same cheerful and somewhat self-protective reply, “I don’t give a fuck.” We don’t challenge this pithy but opaque answer any more than we do Hassan’s “pleading the Fifth.” In Nate’s case, it’s his birthday! He was indeed born on Labor Day, and on this show, he turns 21, taking his first communion from Kenzie as Mama Baylie leaves the room. The ultimate form of “labor” is giving birth, and a mother’s work is never done.
PHOTOS 1 & 2: UNSCENE ABE. PHOTO3: SELFIE
With mom gone, the son becomes the porn performer, sucking Kenzie’s lovely boobs with passion and panache. Perhaps one of the benefits of having a parent in porn is that you pick up some skills! Then again, it could be genetic.
Happy Labia Day!
Taking her turn when Nate leaves the room, Mama Baylie displays her lovely pubic hair-topped labia for Labia Day. Indeed, Baylie and Carmen bond over Labia Day, taking turns spreading each others’ netherlips as well as smooching each other’s upper lips, which gets hot and heavy in the afterparty. Such is the holiday spirit in Bonoboville.
More hijinks ensue than I can possibly describe, climaxing with a twinkling holiday display of labia for Labia Day and freed nipples just for the fun of it. Then we burst like a piñata of end-of-summer joy into the afterparty: singers and swingers, rappers and strippers, laborers and lovers all.
© September 3, 2016. Susan Block, Ph.D., a.k.a. “Dr. Suzy,” is a world renowned LA sex therapist, author of The Bonobo Way: The Evolution of Peace through Pleasure and horny housewife, occasionally seen on HBO and other channels. For speaking engagements, call 310-568-0066.