A Poly St. Paddy’s in Bonoboville
Length 01:36:29 Date: March 18, 2017
Polyamory means “many loves,” not just many sex partners. Nevertheless, it sure seems like being poly gives you more ways to “get lucky,” especially on St. Patrick’s Day Saturday night in Bonoboville.
Certainly, Bonoboville is lucky to have this stimulating group of authors, pundits and porn stars, gathered on and around my broadcast bed. We whip up a sapiosexual’s delight of heart-y and illuminating conversation for the first course of the evening, then top it off with a delicious dessert of poly-flavored Bonoboville Communions with our favorite green adult beverage, Irish-owned Agwa de Bolivia Herbal Coca Leaf Liqueur. As Communion “altars,” we incorporate a variety of body parts, from backs to boobs to an impressive 10-inch Irish shillelagh.
More about that in a few paragraphs.
Dedeker’s Guide for the Polyamory-Perplexed
First up on my broadcast bed is my featured guest, polyamorous pundit and nonmonogamy coach, Dedeker Winston. The quintessential combination of beauty and brains, Dedeker is a nude model and reality TV star (credits include Fox-Tv’s “Utopia”) whose first book, The Smart Girl’s Guide to Polyamory, is a witty, engaging and informative introduction to the wonderful, challenging and somewhat confusing world of alternative relationships. Whether you’re a “smart girl” or just a horny guy interested in learning to juggle multiple lovers and “metamours” (your lovers’ other lovers) with honesty, compassion and “compersion” (feeling good because your lover feels good… with someone else), this book—along with a good scheduling app—will help you find your way.
We talk about Dedeker’s personal evolution from Born Again Christian conservative to polyamory practitioner and spokeswoman, as well as the difference and similarities between open marriages, polyamory, polycules, swinging, ecosexuality, orgies, relationship anarchy and the Bonobo Way.
Multiamory and More
Then there’s “multiamory” which is pretty much the same as “polyamory,” though, as brainy Dedeker points out, “multi” and “amor” are both Latin roots, while “poly” is Greek. “Multiamory” also happens to be the name of the podcast that Dedeker hosts with two partners. One of them, Jase Lindgren, who is also one of her current lovers, joins in on the conversation as it expands and explores the philosophy and practicality of loving multiple partners.
Capt’n Max is perplexed by how polyamorous folks find the time to maintain several serious relationships at once. He’s got his hands full with just maintaining his relationship—going on 25 years of marriage now—with me and my ten toes.
As Dedeker smartly points out, not everyone is as high-maintenance as this lil’ leprechaun. And as Jase says, having more than one child doesn’t make you love the other any less. Well, except for those parents who play favorites, of which there are more than a few.
Ethical Slut, Sex at Dawn, Wonder Woman and Bonobos
It’s been twenty years since I first interviewed Janet Hardy (who had gone by her pseudonym Catherine A. Liszt) and Dossie Easton (in 1997) when they published the premiere edition of their now classic polyamory Bible, The Ethical Slut, and public interest in polyamory has steadily risen since then.
Drs. Christopher Ryan and Cacilda Jethá, also DrSuzy.Tv guests upon first publication in 2010 of their ground-breaking book, Sex at Dawn, popularized the notion that, anthropologically speaking, human beings are more likely to be naturally nonmonogamous, like our close genetic cousins the bonobos (very polyamorous) and common chimps (at least polysexual), as well as all the other great apes, gorillas (the males have harems) and orangutans (they play the field). Lifelong monogamy doesn’t come naturally to most humans. That doesn’t mean it’s bad… or good. Just not inherently better or more natural than nonmonogamy.
The Smart Girl’s Guide to Polyamory does a great job of describing the different types of polyamory movements, groups and tribes, from prehistory to the present. I was tickled to hear that one of the sexiest, most inspiring, female-empowered comic book characters of all time was conjured in the context of a polyamorous triad. Combining the strongest qualities of his indomitable high-achieving wife, Elisabeth Holloway Marston, and live-in mistress (also one of his university students, in the days when such relationships were permissible), Olive Byrne, psychologist/artist Charles Moulton created the image of an Amazonian super heroine, and he called her Wonder Woman.
Porn and Polyamory
One group that tends to be pretty polyamorous, though they rarely describe themselves as such, is the porn community. Porn performers, due to the requirements of their profession, have sex with a variety of partners. Sometimes it’s “all business,” but very often, they become close, caring friends as well as professional lovers. Sometimes, romance ensues with or without the wedding bells, but almost always with a continuation of work, which involves having sex with other people.
Our next two guests, adult performers Natalie Chen and Todd Jones, both talk about how their experiences in porn affect their relationships. Natalie, currently going through a divorce, is especially eager to learn more about polyamory, and Dedeker’s book is next on her must-read list.
Todd doesn’t feel that he’s polyamorous; he has only one girlfriend. Though being in porn makes him at least nonmonogamous. It also gives him a way to have a lot of sex with people he feels confident are safe, as they are STD-tested weekly. Moreover, he enjoys sex as performance… a lot. We find out more about how much he enjoys it in the second part of this show.
But I can’t wait for the second half to begin before pinching both Natalie and Todd for not wearing green.
Pop question: Why do we wear green on St. Patrick’s Day?
Answer (if it’s wrong, sue me; I found it on the internet): St. Patrick’s revelers thought wearing green made one invisible to leprechauns, acting as a kind of camouflage in the green forests of the Emerald Isle.
Leprechauns are magical, but kind of menacing. Like mini-Trump pussy-grabbers, they supposedly sneak up and nonconsensually pinch anyone they can see; that is, anyone not wearing green.
Communing with Todd’s Anaconda
Having spent our first hour immersing our intellects in sapiosexually stimulating conversation, it’s time to get physical by way of spiritual baptism. And what better sacrament for St. Paddy’s Day than Bonoboville Communion with the delectable spirit of Irish-owned, emerald green Agwa?
By the way, the St. Patrick’s Day practice of imbibing adult beverages goes back to the old saint himself who is said to have liked “the hard stuff.” Not only did he convert the pagan Irish to Christianity, but converted a stingy innkeeper into a generous one who filled his patrons’ cups to overflowing. So drink up, cheers, and sláinte ! Though please do not imbibe and drive…
Our imbibing takes a sexier turn than old St. Paddy may have envisioned when he was praying for the bartender to pour him another. First we are joined by two verging-on-polyamorous friends/lovers/fellow porn performers, Kristen Kraves and our own Jacquie Blu. Kristen had such a great time at last Saturday’s Porny Purim in Bonoboville, she had to come back for more. So we make her our first “Altar Girl” for Bonoboville Communion, serving the sacred salt from one of her bodacious boobies to DrSuzy.Tv virgin, Natalie Chen.
Actually, all of this show’s guests are DrSuzy.Tv virgins, but they all go bonobos for Communion, as well as Waterboarding, Bonoboville-style.
Dedeker takes it from Natalie, choosing her tattoo as an altar. Then Jase slurps up his Communion from Kristen’s other boob, and he takes his Agwa Waterboarding like a veteran POW.
Later, I give them St. Paddy’s green Agwa leis, so they now can say that they “got lei’ed” on The Dr. Susan Block Show.
Then it’s Todd’s turn. He chooses to be an altar, and Jacquie volunteers to take Communion from that altar which Todd, Jacquie and everyone else in the Womb Room determine to be between his legs. After a moment, down go his pants and out pops that 10-inch Irish shillelagh.In other words, St. Patrick may have driven the snakes out of Ireland, but the snake that comes out of Todd’s pants is an anaconda… or, as Donnie might say, his eyes bulging as his pants shrivel, “It’s HUUUUGGE!”
Jacquie sucks up her Communion with gusto and then sucks it some more, whereupon I waterboard her with Agwa, as Todd’s super-dick literally hangs like the Leaning Tower of Pisa over her head (Check it out, now playing on DrSuzy.Tv). Then she turns around and keeps sucking it until the end of the show.
For “motivation,” I give Jacquie’s buns a little book–spanking with The Smart Girl’s Guide to Polyamory. Read it or get red by it!
All this hot communing and spanking goes on to the tune of the recently departed (at the age of 90) Chuck Berry’s immortal “Johnny B Goode.” Berry is often said to have been the Father of Rock and Roll. What does “rock and roll” really mean? Sex (of course)! Everything Good cycles back to sex.
Lots of bad stuff cycles back to sex too, of course. Which brings me to the profane joke of the week, from Bill Maher on how Trump lies with such casual nonchalance: “That’s the thing about having tiny hands–it’s easier to pull stuff out of your ass.”
Our Bonoboville Trump doll’s hands are so tiny, they’ve disappeared. We can’t even find his little penis. We keep him under gag-order with a green dildo shoved in his mouth and a safety pin in his ear throughout the show. This is fitting punishment for the Pussy Grabber-in-Cheap’s horrific budget plan that is a pot of gold for the rich, the corporate and, especially, the defense contractors, while mercilessly pinching everything that’s good, and grabbing (and destroying) everything that’s green.
It’s enough to make you cry into your Guinness Stout.
That’s why it’s so satisfying to watch Ireland gab-gifted Prime Minister Enda Kenny’s speech on St. Patrick’s Day eve, say pointedly that “St. Patrick was an immigrant” to a visibly uncomfortable Trump who turns as green as his tie (shown at the beginning of this show).
Erin Go Bragh! And we all go bragh-less, braless and topless, including our own, lovely Irish (on her Dad’s side) Gypsy Bonobo for a communal Free-the-Nipple moment. Special thanks to Wry Mantione for introducing us to darling Dedeker.
Next Saturday, March 25th: Penthouse Pet of the Year Layla Sin returns (uncensored) to DrSuzy.Tv with Penthouse Pet Christiana Cinn to promote Penthouse Variations books with Cleis Press, including Quickies and Three-Ways. Ooo la la!
Then on April 8th, we will celebrate our 25th Wedding Anniversary with a star-spangled group of guests, friends and lovers! Come one, come all, or just come while you sit back and watch us on your favorite screen. Check out last year’s 24th !
So, despite the Orange Menace staining our White House and threatening to demolish everything good and green, we are keeping the Drumpf blues at bay and staying in the pink, combining #resistance with a rainbow of fun in Bonoboville.
Thanks to this week’s volunteers and staff: Camera Operator – Sean Riedy, Conwell Stewart; Photographers – Tim Nguyen, Ivan Olvera; Intern –Maurice Plough; On-Campus Bonobos – Abe Perez, Del Rey, Gypsy Bonobo, Harry Sapien, Jacquie Blu, MarsFX, Johnny Jungle, Clemmy Cockatoo, Ana & Miguel.
© March 19, 2017. Susan Block, Ph.D., a.k.a. “Dr. Suzy,” is a world renowned LA sex therapist, author of The Bonobo Way: The Evolution of Peace through Pleasure and horny housewife, occasionally seen on HBO and other channels. For speaking engagements, call 310-568-0066.
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Billy Cooper
03 · 25 · 17 @ 4:05 pm
Another great show. Thanks for all You’ve done to educate us Doctor Block
Clemmy
03 · 22 · 17 @ 9:30 pm
Super interesting show.
I got a copy of the book, which I have yet to start reading.
Highlight of the show was Jacquie Blu doing what she does best!
PLUS Jase has a seriously sensational smile.
Looking forward to the Pets this weekend.
Gypsybonobo
03 · 22 · 17 @ 7:52 pm
This was such a great show to me because it was so eye opening to different ways to share love, emotions and your partner or partners! Life is not always about expanding your mind, it’s also about learning to expand your heart and why not…your bed! Dr.Suzy and Captain you are always making Saturday night’s worth opening your ears for and your legs for!! Can’t wait to see next weeks!! Love ya my Queen!
Del Rey
03 · 22 · 17 @ 3:45 pm
What a savory, decadent and delicious dialogue on polyamory, Dr. Block. Great show, and amazing guests! Your intimate and vast knowledge on the multifaceted aspects of sexuality is astounding. Many of my questions about this sort relationship dynamic were addressed by yourself and Capt’n Max, who have been married for nearly 25 years, WOW! #GoBonobos!
Todd Jones
03 · 22 · 17 @ 11:48 am
Had so much fun on the show, Dr. Suzy, thanks for having me, hope to be back on in the near future
Dedeker Winston
03 · 21 · 17 @ 5:02 pm
The Multiamory crew loved the wild ride of celebrating St. Paddy’s in Bonoboville last night. Thanks for having us! <3
You can order your copy of The Smart Girl's Guide to Polyamory: Everything You Need to Know About Open Relationships, Non-Monogamy, and Alternative Love by clicking here: http://amzn.to/2mUGQPh
For those of you interested in checking out our podcast on polyamory and non-traditional relationship advice, you can find us here: http://www.Multiamory.com
Johnny
03 · 20 · 17 @ 10:46 pm
Loved the conversation about multiamory. I’m exploring these ideas in my own relationship life–can’t wait to read Dedeker’s book!
Thanks for a great show!!!
~Johnny
Chef Be*LiVE.
03 · 20 · 17 @ 8:10 pm
Incredible!!!
Smokey Binion, Jr.
03 · 20 · 17 @ 7:34 pm
That was nice of y’all to talk about Chuck Berry on your show and play Johnny B. Goode. Rock on Dr. Susan. Smokey.
Harry Sapien
03 · 20 · 17 @ 1:27 pm
This was a paradigm shattering show challenging preconceived notions I didn’t even realized I had– particularly, the Western Concept of Monogamy. We have had it drilled into our heads that you are “supposed” to find a nice girl or guy, settle down, have 2.3 kids, dog, white picket fence etc and only have sex with that person. Similarly, we have been conditioned to demand that your sexual partner also be the one to fulfill all of your emotional and other needs.
I know it will sound dramatic to say that this show changed my life, but it has. It opened my third eye in regards to the entire concept of relationships among us hairless i-phone totting bonobos. Dr. Suzy made the powerful point that monogamy doesn’t really exist among other apes…She then goes on to explain how and why bonobos get along so well. I literally felt a mental “click” inside my head as all these powerful notions and concepts broke through a lifetime of social programming.
Then, on the other side of the spectrum there is the comedy and effortless hilarity that so naturally accompanies the show.
As always, I had a blast watching
Max
03 · 20 · 17 @ 1:19 pm
Great show, hot sex scenes, fun and lots and lots of wisdom. Thank you Dr. Suzy for all your love and devotion promoting a pro-sex world of peace and the pursuit of happiness and freedom from ignorance..