Last night, H’s triumphant post-election erection plowed me like a field filled with fluttering American flags. Yes, we’re still just doing it in the missionary position so far. No woman-on-top, doggie-style, yabyum or hanging from the chandeliers at the moment. Having orgasms during intercourse is no great Olympian feat for the average healthy human animal. But considering that a few months ago, I was almost dead, it feels like a great big deal to me. In fact, my orgasms seem deeper and more explosive than ever. I wonder…are deeper orgasms generally part of the “thankful to be alive” experience, or is that just me? In any case, my pubococcygeus muscle is getting back in shape.

Watching the action!

Speaking of nice shapes (yup, here come some commercials), we just put two new sets of sexy photos BACKSTAGE from “Bonobos & Missionaries in the Squirting Pussy Rainforest” (which you can read about here) by David Acosta and Travis Yoder, featuring the Squirting Wonder Annie Body (coming to the next show!), Luccia and Shayna Knight. Also BACKSTAGE are three sets of hot new pics from “XXXmas Saturnalia” Bacchannal (which you can read about here), by Tom Zimmerman, Sissy Maid and our dearly departed Scott Weems. “XXXMas Saturnalia” is utterly orgiastic in the finest polytheistic sense of the term.

And speaking of XXXmas, Saturnalia, Thanksgiving, Sun Birthday, Hannukkah, Kwaanza, Ramadan, Bodhi Day, Pancha Ganapati, Mesopotamian Winter Carnaval, Agnostic Winter Solstice and the Greek Dionysia – whatever you worship or observe – Kim has just created a sparkling new page of Holiday Gift Ideas, featuring some of our best-sellers and personal favorites all on one webpage.

Now, you might already know that Shopping Heaven is the place to go for sizzling hot holiday sexy gifts for your lover(s)…
from the practical ~ G-Spot Stimulators and Hitachi Magic Wands
to the intellectual ~ Weimar Love: Hot Sex in Pre-Nazi Berlin
to the romantic ~ The 10 Commandments of Pleasure
to the entertaining ~ Blonde Island
to the instructional ~ Squirt Salon
to the kinky ~ why not give your Goddess a Queening Stool or serve your Master while dressed up like a Naughty French Maid?
Yes indeed, we have gifts for lovers galore…

But did you know that we’ve also got some uniquely fantastic gifts you can give your friends? Well, your liberal friends. Now that the Dems have trounced Dubya, being liberal is “in” again, at least through the holidaze. Certainly, the kind of pleasure sex we promote here at the Institute is infinitely more wholesome than the likes of Foley or Haggard. So…wondering what to get that dear liberal bohemian friend of yours? Consider a poignant but slightly spicy DVD like “Zorthian: Art & Times.” Then there’s a Tantra Tea Aphrodisiac Gift Bottle for your yoga friend, Julian Murphy’s erotic art print of Venice for your artsy friend, and our “Bonobo Imperative” DVD for the amateur evolutionary anthropologist in your life.

And did you know that we’ve got totally mild gifts that you can be comfortable giving to your conservative friends and even family members? Check out our Whim ‘n Rhythm of Yale @ the Speakeasy DVD and Juliano’s Raw Foods Cookbook. For your neo-conservative friends bemoaning the recent elections, there’s our “Stop Bitchin’ Start a Revolution” T-Shirt. On second thought, don’t give this shirt to any NeoCons; they’ve started enough trouble. Give them HOODS & handjobs DVDs.

Then there’s you. What about YOU? Give the gift of pleasure to someone you love, even if that someone is you. Why not treat yourself to a rejuvenating, entertaining and/or enlightening session of private telephone sex therapy. It could be the answer to your prayers.

Here’s something else for you: If you’re in or around El Lay, get yourself a Block Studios membership. Then you can invite your friends to the coolest place in town. Do it before our Give Thanks for Life Squirting Spanksgiving Show on November 18th. Hope to see you here!

Well, enough commercials. Now I think I’ll go have another orgasm…When orgasms are achievable, all is possible.