Length: 1:51:12 Date: May 11, 2013
As Masturbation Month moves merrily along, we continue celebrating and exploring the power and glory of self-pleasure and other erotic hedonic joys. This show takes you on a multi-orgasmic roller coaster ride of Masturbation Liberation, Education, Domination, Deprivation, Humiliation, Stimulation, Vibration and Revelation. With all these relevant rhymes and more (titillation, sensation…), somebody could write a hit self-love song…
But why Masturbation Month? Yes, yes, of course, every month is Masturbation Month for most of us; in fact, every day is Masturbation Day, sometimes several times a day. But just as we commemorate Women’s History in March, Gay Pride in June and Black History in February, we honor the fine art, science and pleasure of solo sex in the merry month of May. But still, why award masturbation its very own month? After all, we don’t have an Oral Sex Month, a Spanking Month, a High Heel Month or a Big Hat Month (though maybe we should). We designate a month for masturbation because some kind of self-love is important for all of us. Yes indeed, brothers and sisters, lovers and sinners: the human race is just a bunch of wankers and monkey-spankers! Masturbation is universal. People of all ages do it in every culture, everywhere, even when their religion declares it punishable by death, blindness, impotency, hair on the palms, devastating shame or an eternity in hell.
Why? First and foremost, because self-pleasure feels good! But there’s more. The message of masturbation is simple but revolutionary, even insurgent. This is why Dr. Joycelyn Elders got fired for giving the healthiest sex advice in the world (and President Billy Jeff Clinton should have just shut up and taken her advice instead of getting himself a Lewinsky in the Oval Orifice), and that is that we need masturbation education. We need to learn about our own bodies and erotic minds thru sex-for-one before we share orgasms-for-two or three or a Bonoboville orgy. Because Masturbation is Basic Sex 101. Moreover, masturbation is Basic YOU 101.
The message of masturbation is that if you can help yourself to the greatest sexual pleasure, you really don’t need to kowtow to the demands of an unreasonable asshole husband, a withholding bitchy wife, a crazy sex-negative religion or a repressive fascist government. Only then can you truly love your spouse, your god or your group out of shared joy, not needy desperation and befuddled fear.
The message of masturbation is that you have nothing to fear (excepting the occasional stupid accident like getting a light bulb stuck in your rectum—ouch!). Your pleasure, your stress-release and your freedom are literally at your fingertips. The message of masturbation is liberation. No wonder it’s still so taboo.
Yes, it can imprison some of us in a cycle of compulsive, antisocial, porn-ogling hog-flogging. But usually compulsive masturbation is a symptom of a deeper issue that ought to be addressed, not the cause of the problem. And for the great majority of us, most of the time, self-pleasure is a marvelous, convenient and harmless relief from the pain and pressure of life, a sex educational exploration of our most personal feelings, fantasies and sensations, a little bit of Heaven we can bring down to Earth with nothing more nor less than the wondrous power of our own hands…
And maybe a Sybian. Enjoy this fantastic, orgasmic, masturbation-liberation show!
Lotus Lain: The lovely, lapsed Catholic, libertine Lotus (who loves alliteration) returns in a shocking pink camisole and turquoise leather skirt which she soon strips off to reveal her glorious, well-toned nakedness. She also reveals her courageous, curious spirit. Having made confession on last Saturday’s Sex and God show, she now proclaims herself “unafraid” to celebrate Masturbation Month to the fullest and show off her beautiful self for the education, titillation and liberation of all. First in this show to drop her top for Bonoboville Communion, she also receives and enjoys a new Swingtastic Toys vibrator, rides the Sybian to three riproaring orgasms, dominates her boy Johnny and a cuckold named Steve (see below), holds the Pussy Pipe and performs breathtaking, erotic athletics with studly newcomer Rome Major. Awomen, Sister Lotus!
Rev. Mitcz: Standup comic and distinguished member of the clergy… well, maybe not so distinguished; he’s a Universal Life Church minister (like me and half the people I know). The Reverend confesses that he hasn’t yet self-pleasured today, but it’s not for any religious reason… he tries not to go too many days without masturbating, else he wakes up sticky. Regarding technique, he eschews tissues and goes for distance, shooting that payload into the waste basket, the NBA star of Sex for One. Despite his eagerness to fire far and long, when offered a Bonoboville Jello Shot initially, he politely declines. Which makes us wonder: Is he gay? Monogamous with someone who’s watching? Maybe just nervous this being his virgin voyage on the Good Ship Bonoboville—though the does show his pierced nipples. Or maybe he’s just picky. When Candis offers him a shot from her deep cleavage, he forgets his ecclesiastic vows and dives in.
Candis Higgins: This blonde, voluptuous, Iowa-born mainstream actress seen on every major channel and most of the minors, lover of cocktails and mother of SIX, loves to masturbate and isn’t too shy to tell us. She is a little shy about showing us her big, enhanced, beachball boobs though…or does she just like to tease? She lets us know that if something great doesn’t happen soon in her mainstream acting career, she’s going to do porn (!). But in the meantime, she refuses to air out her airbags…sort of. Pulling her easy-access, hot pink, strapless top half-way down, she presents her priceless nipples for me to suck and a few of us motorboat that ample cleavage and slurp Jello Shots from it. She also sucks several other nipples in the titty orgy and operates the controls on the Sybian for her friend Evilyn Fierce. But when it comes to showing the bottom half of her boobs, well, we’ll just have to see how her mainstream acting goes. We’d like to wish her well in her career but, well, maybe not!
Mistress Eva: Calling herself a “casual” lifestyle domme, sultry Mistress Eva is a slim, trim dynamo with flashing eyes and a thirst for control. She loves masturbation domination, or actually any kind of domination, and especially craves being worshipped and adores being adored. And we adore her! Especially when she says she won’t take off her top and then does (revealing her beautiful, pert, freshly pierced nipples), and when she says she won’t ride the Sybian…and then does. She also gives Steve The Cuck a good walloping with the SLUT paddle, offers her lovely ass for Bonoboville Communion, and generally dominates several other guests, my DrSuzy.tv producer Livia and a platoon of guys at the bar. She says she’s in school but won’t tell us what she’s studying, and she’s also a squirter. Lots to get into next time!
Evilyn Fierce: The return of exquisite Evilyn (who first appeared on my Gun Shots vs Cum Shots show) is a bit of a surprise… Initially, I totally confuse her with Mistress Eva, because they have a similar look. They could be sisters or kissing cousins, and they sure do look good kissing each other. Actually, hot little Evilyn looks great doing anything, especially when she’s stark naked, showing off that perfect little body, especially when she rides that Sybian to an orgasm that seems much too huge to come out of such a tiny lady, and opens her lovely legs to become the great Goddess Venus Sativa, worshipped by all in her sweet smoky Holy of Holies. Boom Shiva Shambalai!
Johnny Chorizo: Lotus calls sweet Johnny her “escort,” and we clarify, to see if he’s “that” type of escort. The answer is “no,” but it’s not long before he’s eating out Ms. Lain with a loving tongue-service worthy of the most professional practitioners. This is after Mistress Eva “makes” him suck her strap-on in front of the entire Womb Room congregation, for which he is highly praised for his skills. Well, that’s The Bonobo Way… you give some powerful females what they want, and they eventually give you what you want, in their own way… and Johnny seemed to be getting what he wanted in a variety of ways that kept on coming into the wee hours of the after-party.
Steve The Cuckold: This is Cucky Steve’s second time in Bonoboville, sent again (so he says) by his loving wife on their wedding anniversary while she spends this special weekend in Vegas enjoying a gangbang with 19 different guys, one for each of the 19 years they’ve been married. While everyone else in the Womb Room is into masturbation liberation, Steve is a willing victim of masturbation deprivation. Not that anyone should feel sorry for him, since this is obviously his fetish, though he solemnly insists it’s all his wife’s idea, and it turns him on to be denied and deprived of sex—even of masturbation throughout Masturbation Month! He starts out dressed like a banker or accountant in a suit and tie, but strips down soon enough to a sheer black crotchless thong that reveals his “chastity belt,” a clear plastic, rather tiny and very confining CB-2000. He revels in the “public disgrace,” and it’s not long before he’s getting more laughs than Rev. Mitcz the stand-up comic. He also gets shackled to the bondage cross by a bevy of beauties, teased, flogged, spanked, sissified and, in a grand climax of hilarity in the after-party, his puny imprisoned dicklet is ceremoniously compared to the big brown treetrunk of our new friend Rome Major (a buddy of our other new friend Moe—remember his Monster that exploded all over Amor Hilton’s tender boobs in Drop Bras Not Bombs?).
Livia Godiva: Kudos to our adorable new DrSuzy.tv producer and amateur medical student for pulling together such a wonderful, whack-happy show—and who jumps right into the whacking, as well as Bonoboville Communion, cuckold spanking and more. Among other things, she teaches us that “Go” is the word for “Cum” in Japanese, and offers me 500 grand for my plastic masturbating tranny toy. Do I hear $600,000?
Liliana: More kudos to our sexy production assistant (who also does webcam, sext and phone sex therapy with the Institute) therapist who decorated the set, serves the Jello Shots and keeps Steve The Cuckold well under control, like she was born to sissify bankers.
Aaliyah Corsets: Another one of our sexy sex therapists is corseted and ready to whip, fondle and play as needed. She confesses that she enjoys mutual masturbation three times a day with her GF Madame V, sometimes via phone sex. As the evening gets hotter, Aaliyah eventually takes to the Sybian (after a very girly “you do it!” “no, you do it!” back and forth with Mistress Eva), making it four-for-four on the masturbation/climax count for the day. Merry Masturbation Month!
WEAPONS OF MASS DISCUSSION
Merry Masturbation Month, Masturbation is Liberation, Masturbation Education, Bill Clinton & Dr. Joycelyn Elders, Masturbation Domination, Skin Abrasions Are Nature’s Way of Saying You’re Masturbating Too Much, Testify, Confession, Dr. Darrel Ray & Sex & God, Why the Human Penis is Better Made for Thrusting Than Other Animal Penises, Sperm Wars, Bukake Fetish, Why Guys Are Fascinated By Sperm, Laughter is a Mental Orgasm, Sensual Domination, Why Some Guys Like To Cum On A Woman’s Face, “Titty Ritual” = Bonoboville Communion, Your “Special Friend” is the One Who Makes You Cum, Webcam Masturbation, Fantasy Roleplay, Speakeasy Member Trying to Get Conservative Girlfriend to Read Sex at Dawn So She’ll Agree to Accompany Him to Bonoboville, Cuckoldry, Incest, The Bonobo Way, Safe Sane & Consensual, Trust Takes Time
Snake Play, Bill Clinton Dildo Play, Striptease, Topless Bonoboville Communion (Thank You Jello Shots LA) Via a Crescent Moon of Salt (Not Cocaine!), Ass for Communion, Sensual Domination, Barking for Us, Playing With a Masturbating Tranny Doll, Communal Nipple Licking & Feeding, Post-Piercing Nipple Striptease, Pretty Panties, Shaved Vulvas, Wacking a Crotchless Panty-Wearing Chastity-Belted Cuckold With the Paddle, Public Disgrace, Doing Jello Shots From Deep Cleavage, Cuckold Forced to Suck a Dildo from Dommes, Putting the Cuckold up on the Bondage Cross, Cunnilingus, Cockteasing, Assplay, Fingering the Clit Along with a Hitachi Magic Wand, Foot Worship, Wearing a Dickmouth, Lesbian Touching & Kissing while Riding the Attachment-Added Sybian, More Sybian Rides, Swingtastic Toys Vibrator Play, Getting Flogged on The Bondage Cross, Smoking Out of the Pussy Pipe from the Holy of Holies of the Goddess Venus Cannabis, Comparing a Big Black Erection to a Tiny White Dicklet in Chastity, Erotic Athletics